title: The Fine Art of Waking Away / Lost Client / The Fine Art of Waking Away / Lost Client / Disengaging from Non-Cooperative Client description: [AFW S.12.34] Securities Client Issue published: true date: 2026-06-30T08:09:25.426Z tags: editor: markdown dateCreated: 2021-06-20T03:00:12.685Z
The Fine Art of Waking Away / Lost Client¶
This is based upon Ephipany #51 - Stand by Your Standards (AFW M.1.51).
Read Nick's This Time Isn’t Different - #30 - Part 2.12 - Some People Just Aren't Going to Make It PDF
Read Nick's ATY 257 September 14 - Fine Art Of Walking Away PDF
Read Nick's ATY 171 June 20 - Never Accept the Captaincy of a Sinking Ship PDF
Read Nick's NMS 72 - When you lose an account to the competition PDF
What Nick Murray Say about Walking Away¶
But in the largest sense, walking away – any time we refuse to enable the prospect and/or he actively refuses our advice–is in itself an art form, and there’s a generalized script for it, should you choose to employ it.
(You may very well not. You may simply thank heaven that you escaped with your life, and vow never to interact with that toxic prospect again. As my bride says, “If you make it out of the lion’s den, you don’t go back for your hat.”)
Here’s one iteration, in which the prospects have inexplicably chosen another advisor. I would have you focus on the answer, which is almost universally applicable.
Advisor “Then I will simply thank you for your consideration, and whole-heartedly wish you every success. And one more thing, which I’ll shortly repeat in my thank-you note to you. A day may very well come––and I’m almost certain it will ––when the economy, and the markets, and your portfolio are experiencing things you no longer fully understand. On that day, I want you to remember that you have a friend here, who will do her best to offer you a sympathetic and unbiased second opinion. That friend will be me. And now I bid you good morning.”
Never let any situation end badly, if you can help it ––and you almost always can. Regardless of whether you jumped or were pushed, go out with class. And leave the door open.
Not many years from now, you may learn that when the couple in the interaction described above got back in their car, she turned to him and said, “I think we just made a big mistake.”
Disengaging from Non-Cooperative Client¶
Read Nick's ATY 265 September 22 - The Exit Interview PDF
Read Nick's ATY 302 October 29 - When Madness Persists PDF
Read Nick's ATY 306 November 02 - The 11th Commandment PDF
Read Nick's ATY 307 November 03 - Killing them Softly PDF
Read Nick's ATY 308 November 04 - You Must Not Relent PDF
Read Nick's NMS 45: Dismissing a client - a letter PDF
Note: the letters below is very strict and strong. Most likely you will not write it in it's entirety. Pick and choose the phrases that are appropriate to your situation. The purpose of the letter is not "reverse psychology" as an attempt to get the client to cooperate; it is, in fact, a true disengagement and is more for your self-respect than a "technique". You may decide to write the letter and never send it (as Abraham Lincoln was known to do).
Letter 1¶
Dear Client,
I'm writing to inform you that I've decided to disengage from our relationship as your Financial Advisor.
I take my profession seriously, but I get the distinct impression that you don't. You say you are serious about making smart choices about your money, that you want to retire with dignity, get out of debt sooner, reduce your monthly bills and properly protect your family.
However, you don't seem receptive to dealing with a financial professional. I have done everything I promised I would do, in fact I have done more, but you have not. I asked you for a commitment to attend my Financial Independence Seminar, and you promised you would, but you didn't. In addition, I volunteered to visit with you last night to answer your questions about your retirement strategy. I arrived only to find no one there. No note, no phone call, no message. You say you're serious, but actions speak louder than words. I cannot work with you under these conditions. Perhaps it was all just an unfortunate coincidence or bad timing and you meant nothing by it.
My intention is not to offend you, I only want to be honest and up-front. This business has been very good to me and I have the freedom to choose the families that I work with, and those that I don't.
I mean no disrespect, but obviously you do not feel comfortable about making the necessary improvements in your finances right now. Unfortunately, your situation will not change by itself, and I am not in a position to be of service to you any longer. Working with a Financial Advisor is a lifetime relationship and requires effort from both parties. You are not ready for that. You will do much better dealing with a quick-stop bank or insurance company, as you have been.
Letter 2¶
Let me get to the point of my correspondence today. I would sincerely like to work with you and believe that my guidance and assistance is exactly what you need to help you plan for a retirement that will last upward of 30-40 years. There will be other benefits along the way - starting a college savings plan, getting your life insurance dialed in and your estate planning docs in place - but the major benefit is that you will have a plan and the peace of mind and clarity that comes from this process.
For whatever reason, you are not ready to take that step. I don't know if you fear change or commitment or if you are unsure if I am the right person to lead you and your family. Regardless of the reason, I am writing today to let you know that I will no longer be reaching out to you. Just as a doctor will not chase a sick patient who refuses treatment or delays taking the prescribed medicine, I will be turning my attention to those who are open and ready to be served.
I have attached our action plan as a reminder of the areas in need of attention - a treatment plan if you will. If this letter or another event stirs you to reengage sometime in the future, I would be happy to talk about what it would take to move forward. I wish you the best in your business and personal pursuits.